A Cautionary Tale…

What’s been keeping me up? People that choose fixer uppers, yet get upset when they need fixing? Why do people choose partners they feel need work? 
This episode is to remind people to respect and love themselves or no one else will. Do not stay with a person because you feel you don’t deserve better. 
In this episode I discuss bad relationships. Ya gotta know when to hold’em and know when to kick’em to the curb! 
I also talk about prison reform and healthcare. They both need a lot of work! 
I know, strange combination of topics? But some how, this episode still flows nicely? 

Transcript

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Hello and welcome to another episode of The Ramblings of an Insomniac. I am Courtney. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening to everybody. I hope you are having a fantastic day. I hope that whatever you do today, it is full of well, good things. I hope you are starting off the day positive and happy and in a good light. Period. I, however, am not, unfortunately. Period. I'm starting off the day hurt and annoyed and irritated. Period. I said period. I said period because I'm used to talking into my text-to-talk. You can tell how much I talk into my text-to-talk, how often I do it when I'm sitting here talking into my phone and I say things like period for the end of a sentence. That's pretty bad. Anyway. First, before I get into my Debbie Downer mood, I want to thank every single person who has been tuning in. Thank you so much. It means the world to me. Period. There have been so many people that have been tuning into my podcast from all over the world. I see people from all different countries and people from all cities across the U.S. And it's awesome. I love it. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I appreciate it. Keep it coming, keep it going. I love being able to have my day start out happy when I check and see how many people have tuned in and the numbers going up. It starts my day off well. So please continue that and remember that I have a YouTube channel, I have Instagram, and I also have TikTok. Again, my TikTok and Instagram are not on a lot because they kind of ban me. YouTube tries to censor me quite a bit. Um, I also have Facebook. But um, so check me out. Check me out on YouTube and like and subscribe. Um, if you can't listen to my podcast on um, you know, if you don't have a platform, you can always listen to my podcast on YouTube. So you can try that. Anyway, hello, good morning, good afternoon. Um, this podcast is probably gonna be kind of a Debbie Downer, so I'm sorry. I'm a little this is just my my PSA to other women out there, because I don't want women to do the same thing that my friend has done or that I have done and make choices to be with people that are just toxic. Toxic relationships, no good. And women, for some reason, always gravitate toward toxic relationships because we're dumb like that. Don't do it. Um it's it's a waste of your time and energy, and it'll end up making you have incredibly you'll be very insecure. And we don't need more insecure people out there, we need strong people. There are far, far too many people who can't handle life, who can't cope with life, who are fragile. We don't need more fragile people. We need to build each other up. We need to build each other up, especially women. Women really love to tear each other down, and I'm not sure why. It's that weird competition in us. And the weird thing is we like to compete over men that suck. We really love to compete. Good job, Gwenny! We love to compete over men that are so not worth our time and energy. Men that will cheat, men that will lie, they will look right at you and lie. They'll look right at you and gaslight and tell you how crazy and terrible and horrible of a human you are. Because you thought that they would cheat and you thought that they would lie. How dare you, how dare you accuse them of cheating and lying. They will gaslight you, they will make you feel stupid, they will call you names, they will be defensive. And you need to know the more defensive they get, the more correct you are. The more they gaslight you, the more they call you crazy, odds are you're probably 1,000% correct. And they're getting pissy because they got caught. No one wants to get caught. It's never fun to get caught. Men like the chase. And when they get bored with the chase and they start having, you know, routine, some men get bored with routine. Not all. Some women get bored with routine. There are personality types out there that like the honeymoon phase. And once you're out of that honeymoon phase, they're bored. Once they've already caught you, they get bored. They love that honeymoon phase. They like the vulnerable phase. They like it when I'm talking about men and women. I'm not saying just men do this. I don't hate men at all. I can't stand it when women get on their hating man thing, hating men thing. Not all men are like this. Just like not all women are victims. Some women prey upon men as well. There are just as many women that prey upon men and take advantage of men as there are men that take advantage and prey upon women. I think it goes both ways. I think we just go about it in a different way. I think women approach it in a different way than men do. But if you've ever fell victim to the wily ways of a man and their charm, um, you know, you get suckered into it. You believe something, you believe what they're selling. They're selling you a product and you invest in that product, and you think that you're gonna get, you know, a good return. So when that person ends up completely devastating you and completely hurting you, it's no fun. It's never good. And it's never good too when those people make excuses and they try to turn it around like it's your fault. I cheated because you weren't there for me enough. I cheated because I wasn't getting what I needed out of you. I cheated because I felt alone. Well, those are the reasons that you talk to your partner and you try to tell them how you're feeling, and you communicate how you're feeling. You tell them that you're feeling lonely, you tell them that you're feeling insecure, you tell them that you want more attention or that you're feeling you're not or that you're feeling you're not getting enough. That is when you're supposed to communicate with your partner. And then if after communication doesn't work and trying your best and putting, you know, it has to be two people trying. A relationship can't work if it's one-sided. A relationship can't work if only one party is trying. Both have to equally be trying. So if after both parties have tried, and maybe you've gone to counseling and it still isn't working, that doesn't mean the next step is to betray each other. That doesn't mean that the next step is to cheat. That means that you, again, if after you have communicated to each other and you have tried, and both of you have put in a lot of effort and you've seen a counselor, if it's still not working, it's time to call it quits. It doesn't mean it's time to cheat. It doesn't mean it's time to betray your partner or be mean to your partner or call your partner names and treat your partner like shit. There's a mentality out there that, oh, I'm just gonna treat my partner like shit so that they will leave. I've been with men like that that say they'd rather treat a woman like crap so that they will hate them, and then they claim it's so that it's easier on the woman. Let me just give you men a tip out there, if you have that line of thought, it doesn't make it easier at all. And it also makes you a coward. It makes you a very, very, very huge coward and not an adult at all. It makes you a child. If you think hurting someone and betraying someone and being mean to someone just so that they will leave you is somehow gonna make it better for the other person. I'm talking to men and women. If you think that treating someone like garbage so that they will leave is somehow gonna benefit the other person, that's benefiting you and only you, and you know that. You know you're making it easier for yourself because you don't have the balls to leave. You don't have the kahunas or love or care about someone enough to just tell them you no longer want to be with them. And instead of being an adult and instead of talking and instead of communicating, you decide to take the easy way out for you, and then claim that you're doing it for them. You're not doing it for the other person, you're doing it for yourself, and shame on you. Shame on you for trying to pawn it off like you're just trying to be the good person. Oh, I'm just trying to make that person hate me, so it's easier. How is that easier? Now you're being mean to that person and you are trying to get them to leave you. No, just tell the person. Be an adult. It's called being an adult, you know what I mean? It's called actually being an adult. It's called being a grown-up. Period. And when you are a grown-up, that's how you do it. Period. But unfortunately, that is not what men do or women do. So just so you know, it's harder when women or men do that to each other. It's never a good thing. Don't make it easier, quote quote. You're making it easier on yourself, not the other person. Anyway, that's all I have to say about that. So anybody out there that thinks that being mean to somebody is somehow gonna make it easier. It doesn't. It makes it harder. Makes it very, very difficult. And it's no fun. All right. Needed to get that out of the way for anybody that needed to hear it. Anybody that's going through it and needed to hear that, just know that people just need to be adults, people need to communicate, people need to talk it out. And if that doesn't work, you need to see a counselor. And if that doesn't work, then maybe it is time to call it quits, you know. Anyway, that's one thing. That's the one thing I wanted to talk about today. Um, the other is if you are having any kind of insurance issues, and right now you are getting like a Medicaid or I mean um like help from the state. If you're getting help from the state, or you're getting, you know, free insurance, I want you to know there are people like me out there that don't get that same thing because sometimes people make just a little bit too much, just a little bit too much to qualify for free. Again, nothing is free. Taxpayers pay that, so it's not free. There's always someone paying for it, but free to you health care. Um, some people make just a little too much to qualify, and then they don't make enough to pay for actual health care, they don't make enough to pay for their own health care, so then they can't go to like the dentist. So for me, I have been having dental pain now for a week. A week I've been going through hell and I've been going through excruciating pain, and um, it's frustrating because I have to go to an oral surgeon, and right now, because of supposed free health care, they're booked out for like over a year. And there are a lot of countries like Canada that have again quote quote free. It's not free, they pay like 60% in taxes, so that's not free. And you can't get into a doctor or a dentist for over, you know, for a year. There's a lot of places you can't get into for over a year because of this supposedly free health care. So now everybody is going to the doctor, which is great. I want people to get seen. I think people have the right to have health insurance. Trust me, I wish there was a way for people to have health insurance without taxpayers having to fork over so much in taxes. I think it's we need to find a balance somehow because I don't think it's right for anybody to go without health care or dental care. But it isn't free, and there are people suffering that are in that in-between where they don't qualify for free health care and they also can't pay for their own, and that's me. And then there's people that are on supposedly free health care and can't get in to see a doctor for a very long time. So then they have to go to the emergency room. Well, emergency rooms cost a fortune. Emergency rooms cost a lot of money. And now you are upping the cost of everything in the emergency room because they have to pay for it somehow. A lot of people don't pay their emergency room bills. A lot of people file for bankruptcy. So they have to charge obscene amounts of money because they know that a lot of people are gonna skip the bill, and they know that a lot of people, um, if they don't skip the bill, are gonna take a very, very long time to pay off the bill. So unfortunately, they raise the cost of everything. So going to the emergency room only ups the cost of everything. And also, if there aren't true emergencies, then all that does is clog up the emergency rooms that need to be used for emergencies. But a lot of people will go there because they can't get seen. So it's a whole circle. The whole thing needs to be revamped. Our entire healthcare system needs to be revamped, our prison care system desperately needs revamped. Because when you're in prison, you really don't get to see a doctor. And I know people are gonna go, well, they're prisoners, so who cares? They're murderers and pedophiles, so who cares? And I mean, I agree. But then that's all the more reason then why maybe death penalties should exist, because I don't believe in keeping people alive just for the sake of keeping them alive. If you choose to keep them alive and you choose not to have the death penalty, then these people need to actually be able to eat edible food and they need to be able to get checkups. Because otherwise, what's the point on keeping them alive? So you can just torture them, so you can feed them because they do get fed food that is not for human consumption. That's a fact. These prisons have food that is not for human consumption. They have green chicken, they have food that they used to. I know people that have been in prison. I know many people that have been in prison, and prison reform is needed, especially because right now the reoffense rate in America is very high. It is incredibly high. Because unfortunately, the offense rate, or excuse me, unfortunately, prison doesn't help rehabilitate anybody. We need rehabilitation programs. We need counseling. We need people to have access to see counselors. Sorry, my dog is in the background. You can hear him breathing. But I wish they would have like white-collar crimes. If you do white-collar crimes like tax evasion, if you didn't pay your taxes, I don't think you should go to prison. I'm sorry. I think what you should do is maybe give free accounting or something. Maybe if you're someone that's really good with numbers and you have committed fraud, maybe instead of going to jail with people who have murdered people and are pedophiles and have raped people, I don't think that any person that has committed tax crimes deserves to go to prison with murderers because then what happens is you send these people in as perfectly normal people that sure committed a crime. I'm not defending tax evasion. I'm not saying tax evasion is okay. I'm not saying that those crimes are okay. I'm saying yes, you should have consequences. Yes, you should have accountability. But throwing them in with a bunch of murderers and rapists and pedophiles, I don't think is the answer. Because unfortunately, what happens is these people go to prison for years and they have to basically come up with a whole other personality just to survive in prison. Prison is hard. Prison is very, very, very racist. They have things called cars, like cars that you drive, and those cars are different races. You have the white car, the black car, the Native American card, and you have different cars of different gang members, and you have to make sure that certain gang members aren't in the same prison with other gang members because they'll kill each other. So you can't throw in people that did things like white-collar crimes in with murderers and stuff because that's really going to fuck over someone's personality. It's going to change them. And I just don't think they deserve that. I think what would be better suited is maybe they have to have their wages garnished. Maybe they have to, after work, they have to spend a couple of hours helping people with their taxes for free. Maybe they have to, you know, pay it back and help people with taxes. Maybe there are people out there that, you know, people that are involved in riots that have burned down or broken windows or destroyed people's businesses. Instead of going to jail, I think they should have to look the people in the eyes, the people that owned those businesses, the small mom and pop businesses, the small mom and pop businesses, they have to look the owners in the eyes and look at the people whose lives they've ruined, whose business they've ruined. They should have to stare them in the eyes and then help them rebuild. Help them paint, help them clean up, help them in any way, every day after school, instead of going out with their friends, instead of being in sports, instead of going to the prom. No, they have to go and work for these people or they have for free, or they have to help these people rebuild. Now you're gonna say, well, people are gonna be assholes about it and they're not gonna do it. Well, then maybe give them the option, say, okay, you can either do three years in prison, or you can help these people rebuild. You can go on the weekends, you can go on the holidays, you can go after school, and you can help these people rebuild. And you have to look these people in the eye and see exactly who you screwed over. You have to look these people in the eyes and see who you fucked over. I think you could give them the option, because sure, there's gonna be people that just don't know how to paint and don't know how to build and don't have those skill sets. There's people that know how to clean, you could teach them how to build, you can teach them how to do these things. Then they're walking away with a skill set. But I think they should have to look the people in the eye of those that they harmed. Because there's such a disconnect nowadays because of the internet. Because of the internet, people don't even look at humans as human anymore, they're just a robot. I don't know. Just my opinion. I think that jail doesn't work for everybody. Again, I'm I'm not saying people shouldn't have consequences. They absolutely should. 1,000% have consequences. I just think that well, I know that our prison system, at least here in America, does not work. It doesn't work at all. We need a better rehabilitation system. And we need a better we just need a better way of doing things. And if you're gonna keep people in prison for years and years and years, for 25 to life, I think they need to actually be able to see a doctor and they need to have food that is edible. Again, why keep people alive just so you can torture them? I think that there either needs to be the death penalty, or if you're gonna keep them alive, then again, don't sit there and um treat them as though they're subhuman. Because of course, murderers don't deserve to have ice cream and deserve to be playing around and having a good time. I'm not suggesting that these people should have a good time while they're in prison. I'm just saying that they also deserve, though, to eat food that's edible. Otherwise, you should just put them, sentence them to death because you're just keeping them around to torment them then. And again, for someone that's a serial killer, maybe they deserve to be tormented. Maybe they deserve to be treated like shit, of course. But again, then I think that's just the death penalty. I think we just need to kill serial killers. I don't think they deserve to be sitting around in prison. That's my opinion. But I think people that commit white-collar crimes should not be going to prison. It doesn't do anything, it fucks people up, and then I feel like they come out worse people. I feel like they went in, just because you commit tax crime, it doesn't mean you're a bad person. It really doesn't. We don't know the circumstances. I'm not making excuses, not saying it's okay. I'm just saying there could be someone that's a great human being and they fucked up. They did a bad thing. And sending them to prison just doesn't help. In fact, I think they come out worse people. No one comes back from prison and I mean sh- Oh, oh I'm sorry. Sorry, you guys. I accidentally, I'm sorry, I accidentally stepped on my dog. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. I don't know. Just my opinion. Like I said, I'm kind of grumpy today. I'm not feeling good. My tooth is still hurting, and I'm just sick and tired of people out there using the System and meanwhile I've been having to deal with pain for a week and I can't get in to get things taken care of for like over a year. So what the hell am I supposed to do? Now if I had insurance, I could get in. If I had my own insurance that I paid for, I could get in. It's just frustrating. And then there's people out there that are still complaining and still bitching and still whining because they don't have enough. They don't have enough. What is enough to you? When are you going to stop complaining? When is there going to be a time that you're content? Because liberals keep complaining and complaining and wanting more and more. And then they get it. Then they get what they ask for. They get what they want and they still complain. And they still whine and they still bitch. And then they complain more and they get more and they still bitch. So if you're a liberal out there that's still claiming you want more, when are you gonna shut the fuck up, honestly? When are you going to shut up, be happy, and stop complaining? When you're dead? Then you'll probably still haunt and go, now I dined. Now I died. Shut up. No one wants to hear you anymore. All you're doing is bitching and bitching, and meanwhile, there are people out there like me that can't even get into a doctor. So shut up. Honestly, everyone's sick of it. And if you're not sick of it, you should be. It means it hasn't affected you. And people tend to not complain about things that don't affect them, obviously. If it doesn't affect you, then you're not going to complain about it. It's like a Martha's Vineyard thing. All those women were 100% on board with illegal immigration. Oh, let them all in, let them all in, until they had to deal with it. When they had to deal with it, then all of a sudden it was take them back, take them back. We don't want them, take them back. Really? Because it was this side of yesterday, you said bring them all in. So if you're not the one dealing with the consequences, of course you don't have a problem. And that makes you selfish. I think of how things affect everybody. I think of how things affect America. I think of how things affect my state. I think of how things affect my city, my life, me. Not just myself. It's a great day when you can pull your head out of your own butt and look around and see that you're not the only human on earth. You're not the only human with beliefs and has a religion or a sexual orientation or a political affiliation. You're not the only one that has a certain race or um a gender. Everybody has their own thing going on. But this world has just become all about me, me, me, I, I, I. Again, I say this a lot. I say this a lot, but it's true. It's like finding Nemo with those seagulls. Mine, mine, mine, mine, that's liberals. Mine, mine, me, me, my thoughts, my beliefs, my race, my gender, my identity, my wants, me, me, I, me, me, I. Pull your head out. Look around. There are other humans beside yourself. I don't know if you're aware of that, but you should check out this world that doesn't just revolve around you. It's pretty great. Because you're not solving anything by complaining. You're not helping anybody, including yourself, by bitching and moaning incessantly and getting on social media and complaining incessantly. You see, you have to actually be part of the solution. You have to actually have solutions and try to figure out how to help yourself and others. Which people, again, just like to complain without solutions. I've done it, I've done it many times, and I'm wrong every time I've done it. But I usually try to vent about stuff and then try to figure out a solution for it. We don't see a lot of that anymore. Just a lot of bitching. And I don't know why, because if you're from the United States, what the fuck are you bitching about exactly? Like what exactly are there too many options? Are you complaining because there are too many options? There's there are too many types of food, too many different jobs, too many different people. Are there too many races, too much diversity? Too many different options of clothing places and grocery stores. I mean, get over yourself, honestly. If you're from America, you're privileged. I don't care what race you are. I don't care what you're what you identify as. If you're transgender in America, you're privileged. If you're white, black, Native American, Hispanic, Asian, whatever in America, you're privileged. If you're fat, tall, skinny, short, man, woman, bisexual, gay, you're privileged. You are privileged if you live in America. I don't care if you're the poorest person in the world. The homeless people get free drugs. Karen Bass wants to give homeless people free teeth. I need teeth. My teeth are horrible. My teeth are horrible, and I've been working since I was 14. If you can't babysitting and lemonade stands and yard work, I've been doing that since I was like 10. Since like I was 10 years old, I've been doing some form of work. I deserve my teeth to be fixed. I'm sitting here for a week now dealing with massive tooth pain. Meanwhile, meth heads who lost their teeth because of their choices, because of things that they chose to do, you're gonna give them free teeth for what? So they can go do more meth? The homeless people around here get free drugs. Fuck, I would love some free drugs. Maybe I'd be happier. They get you have access to fountains to get things to drink. You can have access to clean water because you can go into public bathrooms and drink water, you can go to the bathroom, you can splash yourself and take a sponge bath. You have access to more things as a homeless person in America than you do in a lot of other countries. So if you're in America, shut the fuck up and stop complaining. If you don't have things, get them. A lot of people, white, black, or otherwise, go without. It is not just black people, it is not gay people. In fact, if you're gay, shut up. You're not oppressed at all. Being gay is just not as cool as you think it is. No one gives a shit if you're gay. Being gay has literally been around since the dawning of time. It is not new. Men have dunk around, have done stuff with other men, and women have done things with other women since women and men have been in existence. Since there have been humans, men have touched other men and women have touched other women. That's just a fact. Being gay is not some new fangled thing at all. And you get there's there are zero rights that you don't have as a gay person. Zero. And if you ask a gay person that, they can't tell you a single right that has been taken from them because there haven't been any. Now, if you are gay or trans in the Middle East, in like South Africa or something, you're probably gonna have a problem. There are gonna be countries where being gay and being trans or being black or being white. Hell, if you go to South Africa right now and you are a white farmer, you're gonna get slaughtered. If you're a Christian, you're gonna get slaughtered. I hate to tell you, white people are Christians, white people are farmers, and black people like to think they've cornered the market on oppression, which is weird to me because they haven't been oppressed since the 1800s, and it was white people that helped them. So shut the fuck up if you're black, shut the fuck up if you're trans, shut the fuck up if you're gay, shut the fuck up in general if you live in America because you are privileged. You have no rights taken away from you, and you may be poor and you may be on the streets and you may have a really hard life, but it is not because you live in America, and it is not because you're black, and it's not because you're gay, and it's not because you're trans. It's because of choices that you've made, or because unfortunately, you've grown up in a very poor, poor neighborhood. Maybe you've made really, really good choices, and unfortunately, maybe you've had really bad luck. Maybe you've had a bad life, but it's not because you're trans and it's not because you're gay, and it's not because you're black. It's because there are plenty of people who are white and Asian and Native American who also have bad lives. It's because you're a human and humans suffer. Humans have been suffering and going through trials and tribulations since there have been humans on the planet. In fact, they used to go through a lot more trials and tribulations than you do now. So maybe try being grateful. Maybe try putting positivity out there. Maybe don't be lazy. Maybe get off your ass. And if you aren't lazy, and maybe you've been trying, and life still, still has been terrible to you, well, welcome to the club, because that's my life too, and I'm a white, straight person, and my life has been very, very, very hard. But I'm not sitting here going, oh, sure, there are days I do that. There are days I do that because I'm not human, and humans are allowed to complain. Humans are allowed to be sad, humans are allowed to be angry. But when you're wallowing in it and you're trying to somehow benefit and profit off of your grief, give me a break. Give me a break. Sorry, this is not the kind of podcast that if you're wanting self-pity, if you're wanting someone to coddle you and pat you on the head and tell you how, you know, that you're a martyr and a victim, this isn't the podcast. Unfortunately, I'm not in the business to call people, you know, to make people feel like the victim. I want people to be strong. I want people to have confidence in themselves. I want people to wake up every day. If they're sad or angry, go through it. Allow yourself to be sad and angry and pissed. Go through those feelings. I've said this every podcast. We have feelings for a reason. It's okay. It's okay to be pissed. It's okay to feel sorry for yourself once in a while. It's okay to be angry and hurt. I'm just saying don't live in it and don't make it an excuse. If you live in America, you have it much easier than a lot of other people. If you live in Canada, you have it a lot easier than a lot of people. So I'm saying suck it up, Buttercup, and find your inner strength. Channel that strength. Get angry and then do something about it. Get angry and do something. Be hurt, be sad, and use that as fuel to achieve something. And if you're with someone that treats you like shit and lies and cheats, they're never gonna change. No amount of counseling is gonna change someone who constantly cheats. If they've cheated more than once, they're gonna continue to cheat. Sorry. That's just, I'm saying you can cheat once and maybe it'll never happen again. But if a person has cheated more than once, odds are they're gonna continue to do so. Again, fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on you. Learn to see the signs. It's hard, again, especially with women. Women are fixer-uppers and we want nothing more than to change someone. But why would we be with someone that we want to change? Why would you want to be with them if you don't like how they are currently? If you don't like how a person is currently, why spend any amount of time on them? Life is short. Life is very, very short. You should spend it with someone who already is what you want and need. Everyone's gonna have flaws, everyone's gonna have issues, no one's going to be perfect, so you're never gonna find that perfect human because that perfect human does not exist. So I'm not saying go and find yourself someone perfect because you'll be looking for eternity. I'm saying though, don't be looking for a fixer upper, male or female. Why would you want to invest that time? I want to invest that time on myself. I want to invest that time on me. I have too much of my own shit I need to work out. I have my own issues I need to attend to. I don't want to also have to attend to somebody else's bullshit. That's just me. I'm just saying that if you constantly, constantly pick fixer-uppers, then don't complain when you get just that. Don't complain when you get a fixer-upper if that's all you go for. You know? That's all I'm saying. Pick a person that you get along with. Pick someone that shares your your religion, shares your beliefs, you know. Someone that you can laugh with and get along with, and that you spend the majority of time getting along with. You're always gonna fight, you're always gonna have someone that you're gonna argue with, because again, we're humans and but it's weird if you get along 24-7, 365 days a year. You're gonna have little arguments, but I'm talking if the majority of the time you get along, that's the person you want. You don't want to spend the majority of your time trying to fix things. I'm learning that. So I'm sorry, I know this podcast was a bit of a downer. I know I'm being kind of a downer these days, but it's also just a cautionary tale. I just want people out there to start believing in themselves. I think women or people in general are so insecure that we pick people that are not good for us because we're just insecure and we pick anybody because we just want somebody there. And we need to invest in ourselves. If we don't invest in ourselves, no one else is going to. If we don't respect ourselves or value ourselves, no one else is going to. We have to love and respect and value ourselves, and we have to have confidence in ourselves, or no one else is going to. So it starts with us. That's what this podcast is about. You, us taking responsibility and accountability for our actions and our behavior, and not trying to pawn it off on white people, straight people, Trump. It's not Trump's fault that your life is a mess. It's not straight people's fault and white people's fault that your life is a mess. You need to take accountability for that. And it's not billionaires' fault that they are billionaires, it's billionaires deserve to be billionaires. They've earned it. If you want to be a billionaire, you earn it. And again, um, I bet you a million dollars, all those people that are like billionaires need to pay and pay and pay and pay, they already do. They already do. So if you become a billionaire, according to your own logic, according to your logic, you're saying that if you become a billionaire, if you win the lottery, if you become very wealthy, if you have millions of dollars according to your logic, you should give it all away. You should give it all away so that you are back to being poor again. Because liberals think that wealthy people need to be poor so that everybody is poor. Liberals want everybody to be poor, which just doesn't make any sense because they don't want to be poor. And if they were rich, they would love it. And they certainly aren't going to give away 80% of their wealth to everybody else so that they're back down to being poor again. So it's a stupid fucking thing for liberals to say, and they say it all the time, and it's dumb because already billionaires, for a fact, pay like 60%. Poor people don't. Poor people get free everything and get taxes back and get earned income credit. So you get hundreds to thousands of dollars per child when you're not even working, you're not even paying into taxes. You don't even pay a dime into taxes and you get money back because you've had children. You get free health care, you get free cell phones, you get free help with rent, you get scholarships, you get all kinds of free things. Billionaires don't get that. They pay for everybody. They pay 60%. If it weren't for billionaires, nobody would have anything. And people forget a lot of billionaires actually donate and give to charity. But people don't want to be forced to do it. People want to have the option. And when people have the option, like vaccinations, if people weren't forced to get vaccinations, I bet you more people would have got them. But when someone's trying to force you to get rid of all of your money and force you to do something, then people are gonna go, fuck you. I live in America, I have rights, and I don't have to. And you trying to bully me into something is gonna make me not want to do it. So maybe if you don't bully people, they'll just do it. Usually, if you allow people to have the option of being good and bad, most people are going to pick being good. Most people are gonna choose to do the right thing. So we don't need to be bullied into it. And again, there's the whole my body, my choice. I love how liberals can go, my body, my choice, but then force everybody to do everything. It's just the hypocrisy and it's ridiculous. So stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you have a shit life, fix it. Fix it. Or shut the fuck up because frankly, I'm just exhausted. People need to learn some grace too. Because I love how everybody acts like everybody else is a piece of shit while thinking that they are so perfect and they've never fucked up before. Look at yourself. Are you a perfect human? Have you ever fucked up? Have you ever accidentally said something mean or said something mean on purpose and then felt bad later? Yeah, you have. You have. Have you ever just been a dick for no reason? Yes. Have you ever been a bitch for no reason? Yeah. Have you ever done something wrong that you knew was wrong but you did it anyway? Yeah. So stop. Start giving grace. Start realizing that you're not perfect, so quit expecting everybody else to be. Clean your own doorstep. Get rid of the skeletons in your closet before you start expecting everybody else to cater to you and be perfect. Because I'm over it. I'm spending the rest of my life doing what makes me happy and my family happy. I am spending the rest of my life doing what makes me happy, and I'm not going to make excuses as to why I don't have things. And I'm not going to continue to pick fixer-uppers because that'll be my fault. So this podcast is just to remind everybody to pull their head out of their butt and realize that they are not the only humans in the whole world. Other people have just as strongly as you feel about your religion, your sexual orientation, your political point of view, as strongly and passionately as you feel about those things, just remember other people feel the same, and it's not only about you, you, you. There's too much of that. Start being part of the solution. Start being grateful. Start being thankful. Start being positive. Stop being lazy. Stop picking fixer-uppers. Start taking accountability. If you're not going to respect yourself, no one else will. You need to respect others and give grace to others as well. I know this is a cranky negative podcast, and I'm sorry, but I told you I would do a podcast on the things keeping me up. And right now, the things keeping me up are selfishness and lies and just ungrateful people and hypocrites. I'm tired of it all. And I'm going to speak for myself when I say I'm not going to make excuses. But I'm also going to say, again, I thank every single person that has been tuning into my podcast. I thank everybody so much for the fact that there are millions of podcasts out there and you choose, you choose to tune into mine. And that means a great deal to me. I try to think of clever ways to say thank you, but that's all I got is thank you, thank you, thank you. Again, you can check out my YouTube and like and subscribe. You can check out my podcasts on YouTube. You can check out Instagram. And you can always email me at ramblingsofaninsomniac49 at Gmail. That's ramblingsofaninsomniac49 like 49 at Gmail. I genuinely wish every single person out there a wonderful day. And again, remember, I don't care if you're trans. I have nothing against trans gay people, black people, Asian people, anybody from any race, any religion. I don't care if you're a liberal, as long as you are not harming others, as long as you're not attacking others, as long as you're not harming others and attacking others. And um, if you're not an asshole, I accept everybody. I accept everybody from every country and all walks of life. I could give a crap who you sleep with, who your partner is, what color you are, what religion you are. I don't care. I care about character. If you have good character, you're in. If you don't, you're out. That's how it works for me. So everybody from all walks of life are welcome. Not that I could do anything about it anyway, even if I said, hey, I don't want so and so, you can still listen to me, obviously. I have no say over that. I love when people say that. When they try to go, well, we're not going to like when Pink and Eminem, well, we're not going to go to any red states. Who fucking cares? You think we give a shit, Pink? You need us, remember? You need us. No one needs you, Pink, except your family. No one needs you, Eminem, except your family. So no one gives a fuck about you. So stop thinking everyone cares. We don't. Pink, if you happen to be listening, we don't give a shit about you, you narcissistic bitch. God, you're a cunt. Sorry, but she is. And Eminem is just the weirdest douche. God. He never knows what he wants. That man is so messed up. I feel bad for his children. He's bipolar as fuck and he needs some help. And I'm not knocking bipolar people. I'm probably bipolar. I'm just saying he's bipolar and he needs help. Not saying there's anything wrong with being bipolar, just saying he needs help. Anyway, I digress. My point is, thank you for tuning in. I appreciate it. My point is, I don't care who you are. If you're pink and Eminem, go fuck yourself. But hey, people, I'm not everybody's cup of tea, trust me. I am not everybody's cup of tea. Not everyone's gonna like me, and not everyone's gonna listen to my podcast, and I'm okay with that. But to those of you that are, I am freaking excited about that. I'm so excited that more and more people have been checking out this podcast and telling people thank you so much. I appreciate it. You rock, you mean the world to me, and I hope that the rest of your day is fabulous. Thank you so much until next time.